It may seem like an uphill battle to protect the innocence of modern
young people.
Some parents may give up too soon, thinking it an impossible
task, or that it
doesn’t really matter in today’s world. But purity
and innocence are very
important in our spiritual development. Jesus
tells us in his Sermon on the
Mount: “Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they shall see God.” This Beatitude
means that our understanding
of God requires a purity of thought and motive.
The pleasures of the
senses would adulterate, or muddy, our clear sense of God
and His
universe. We would continue to walk blindly through the mists of earth,
if
we did not attempt to rise above the clouds of sin. We must strive
to teach our
children how to avoid the temptation of adultery, if
we want them to be happy and
successful in life.
Mary Baker Eddy,
the Discoverer and Founder of
Christian Science, writes:
“Too much
cannot be done towards guarding and guiding well the germinating and
inclining thought of childhood. To mould aright the first
impressions
of innocence, aids in perpetuating purity and in unfolding
the immortal
model, man in His image and likeness.” (First Church of
Christ, Scientist
and Miscellany 261)
Although many parents and Sunday School teachers
see the need for teaching
the Seventh Commandment to young children,
some may feel uncomfortable
talking about this subject, and are looking
for a way to approach this
Commandment without bringing up the subject
of sex. They may simply choose
to skip this one!
However, Mary Baker
Eddy does not exclude this Commandment in her
requirement for young
Sunday School pupils to be taught the “first lessons,” and
that is
wise. There is no need to avoid the subject of adultery, since there
is a
way to discuss its meaning with young ones without having to
first explain “the birds
and the bees.”
If you will first read my
previous essay on the Seventh Commandment, you
will see that there
is a broad meaning that covers physical, moral, and spiritual
stages
of thought, seen through the teachings of Christian Science. It is
not just
about sex! In that essay, you will find background material
and ideas that would
be appropriate for sharing with older children
and teens.
If you would like to have ready-made lessons exploring
this Commandment
Science, Volume One: The Ten Commandments, which
has about ten lessons
on the Seventh Commandment to share with young
people, including teens. The
book has over 100 daily lessons on all
of the Commandments.
It is never too early to begin the quest of inoculating
our children against the virus
of lust and adultery. Mrs. Eddy tells
us:
“Dear reader, right thinking, right feeling, and right acting
— honesty,
purity, unselfishness — in youth tend to success, intellectuality,
and
happiness in manhood. To begin rightly enables one to end rightly,
and
thus it is that one achieves the Science of Life, demonstrates
health,
holiness, and immortality.” (Miscellany 174)
For Young Children:
When children are old enough to understand what it means to “keep
a promise”
– that when we agree with someone to do something, we must
do it – they can
be taught that this is part of what the Seventh Commandment
means. That
would be a good start. They can practice this Commandment
by being loyal
and obedient to their parents and family members, as
well as being taught how
to be loyal and obedient to God. Little children
can also be taught how to keep
out the impure thoughts that would
make them rebel against their parents. They
can be told that it is
natural for them to love to do good and be good. You can
play a game
with them by pretending to be a “devil” or “angel,” and asking which
thoughts to let in. Students can also learn to “stand porter at the
door of
thought.” (see Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, by
Mary Baker
Eddy, 392:24)
To help get you started with introducing
the Seventh Commandment, you might
read or explain to children it
in the following way:
“‘Thou shalt not commit adultery’ means that
we should not bring
impure thoughts and behavior to our marriage.
When a man and
woman marry, they make a promise to love and honor
each other.
If one of them breaks that promise, by going to someone
else for the
kind of love and affection they should be getting only
from their
marriage partner, then it might be said that they are ‘committing
adultery.’ In the same way, we also do not let impure thoughts muddy
the understanding of ourselves as the ‘image and likeness’ of God.”
“The
Seventh Commandment, ‘Thou shalt not commit adultery’ helps
us to
keep our families together and to draw us closer to God. Adultery
poisons the marriage relationship. Everyone suffers in some way. But
think how happy a family would be if everyone was trusted to be loyal
to the family. In the same way, we must be true and loyal to ourselves
and to God. We must not look for happiness outside of our relationship
with God, good. Learning to turn away from wrong behavior while
young,
helps us gain the self-discipline which will protect us from
committing
adultery. This will keep our lives pure and in obedience to
God.”
(Cole, Vicki Jones: “First Lessons in Christian Science, Volume
One:
The Ten Commandments”)
To help both young and older children grasp
some of the concepts involved,
you can try to illustrate the problems
that occur when things that need to remain
pure are made impure. For
instance, show how adding something such as
dirt to a pure glass of
water will cause the liquid to look or taste different. The
impurity
can spoil the drink. The drink of water becomes useless to humans
who need pure water for nourishment or cleansing. Some children may
understand a discussion on environmental pollution, and how that affects
the
quality of life on earth.
When the children see this cause and
effect of mixing pollutants with pure water,
discuss how God’s children,
who were created pure and innocent, need to keep
their thoughts and
their hearts pure, as well, so that they can fulfill their purpose
in life. Ask what kinds of thoughts or activities could poison their
purity. Relate
this to the Seventh Commandment, which tells us not
to adulterate our
relationships, or to break our promises. Ask your
children or students why it is
important to keep our relationship
with God pure. What would try to interfere
with our unity with God?
Can we hear or see God if our thoughts are clouded
with wicked or
impure suggestions?
For Older Children:
In addition to the above,
you can discuss the importance of loyalty in our
relationships with
our friends. Older kids are learning what it means to be a true
and
loyal friend. They certainly know when others have betrayed them,
even if
they do not yet see how they could be guilty themselves! Ask
for examples of
loyalty or disloyalty in action. Perhaps they have
felt let down or abandoned by
others, or they have been the victim
of gossip, teasing, or being ousted by a
new clique. Ask how they
feel when this happens. Do they feel sorry when they
have broken their
own promises to a friend? How can they make it up? How
often should
they forgive another for a seemingly disloyal act? Discuss the
Golden
Rule and its relation to the Seventh Commandment.
Show how our friendships
give us opportunities to practice the qualities that
will prevent
us from breaking the Seventh Commandment when we are older.
We should
be true and loyal friends -- unselfish, humble, gracious, and
self-controlled
-- so that we can be the same with any future marriage partner,
and
with God. Learning to obey
all of the Ten Commandments, not just the
Seventh, will be a shield and armor in life.
Older children can also
benefit from the following areas of discussions, some
of which are
included in the lessons in my book, and most of which are explored
in-depth in my
previous essay on the Seventh Commandment:
1.
Choosing
friends. We need to make wise choices in friends, so that
we are not
tempted to spend our time in activities which would harm our
purity,
our morals, our intelligence, and integrity. Point out Mrs. Eddy’s
quote: “Never breathe an immoral atmosphere, unless in the attempt
to purify it.” (S&H 452)
2. Marriage. The Christian Science textbook
has an entire chapter on the
subject of “Marriage,” and older children
and teens can begin to study
Mrs. Eddy’s practical advice and spiritual
interpretations on this special
relationship. They will find in there
this statement, which can be a springboard
for further discussion:
“Marriage should improve the human species, becoming a barrier
againstvice, a protection to woman, strength to man, and a centre for
the
affections. This, however, in a majority of cases, is not its present
tendency, and why? Because the education of the higher nature is
neglected,
and other considerations, — passion, frivolous amusements,
personal
adornment, display, and pride, — occupy thought.” (S&H 60)
3.Atonement. In addition to the chapter on “Marriage,” the chapter “Atonement
and Eucharist” in Science and Health, introduces the subject of our
“at-one-ment”
or unity with God. This unity is the real covenant or
bond that is never to be
adulterated. Older kids ready to explore
this truth of “Principle and idea” being
One (See S&H, pg 465),
can begin to understand the “Law of Love” that
necessitates the Seventh
Commandment.
4. Male/female qualities make up our completeness. This
is discussed in
the chapter “Marriage,” and throughout the textbook.
See my previous essay for
how this relates to the Seventh Commandment
and for suggested citations to read.
5. Divorce and sexual affairs.
Some children and teens are forced to deal with
this up close and
personal in their own families. Each situation needs to be
handled
according to the need, and with God’s guidance. Mercy and forgiveness
is usually called for. Point out how Jesus handled the woman caught
in the act of
adultery (John 8). Teach kids how to turn to their Father-Mother
God for stability
and comfort.
6. Influence of the media. While premarital
sex and adultery certainly existed
before the advent of books, movies,
television, and the Internet, the onslaught
of sexual images in today’s
media cannot help but overwhelm young minds with
ideas they are not
prepared to handle. Since parents cannot always be around
to monitor
what their children watch, it is wise to at least try to teach children
and
teens the reasons why they should want to avoid explicit images
of sex and
violence on their own. Teach them to value innocence and
purity, and to protect
these qualities as aggressively as they would protect
their lives or their
treasured possessions. If they can experience
Christian Science healing, or
the joys of a Christian outlook, they
may want to keep their minds free from
the sins that might muddy their
vision of God, good, in their lives. As they
learn more about Christian
Science, they will begin to see the claims of power
that unGodlike
images have on our physical and mental health, and they may
willingly
avoid media that is obviously harmful to their peace of mind.
7. Happiness.
Explain that those who search for sex or love outside of marriage,
are not usually bad people, but are often simply victims of ignorance.
They are
“looking for love in all the wrong places.” Our happiness
is not found in sex, or
from the adulation of other people, but in
Soul, God. Mary Baker Eddy writes:
“Soul has infinite resources with
which to bless mankind, and happiness
would be more readily attained
and would be more secure in our keeping,
if sought in Soul. Higher
enjoyments alone can satisfy the cravings of
immortal man. We cannot
circumscribe happiness within the limits of
personal sense. The senses
confer no real enjoyment.” (S&H 60-61)
“Unselfish ambition, noble
life-motives, and purity, — these
constituents of thought, mingling,
constitute individually and collectively
true happiness, strength,
and permanence.” (S&H 58)
“Happiness consists in being and in
doing good; only what God gives,
and what we give ourselves and others
through His tenure, confers
happiness; conscious worth satisfies the
hungry heart, and nothing
else can.” (Message for 1902 17)
CONCLUSION:
There
appears to be so much immorality and sensuality abroad in the world,
that getting through to our children sometimes may seem like
trying to fill
a bottomless bucket with water. However, if we
can recognize the innate
innocence and purity of God’s child that
is the true identity of each and every
one of us, and claim this forcefully
in our daily prayers for our children, we
can take heart that the
Truth is doing its work to counteract the suggestions
of evil.
God’s
angels are also on guard to protect the innocent ones, and
will always
come to the rescue of a receptive thought.
Children can
be taught to love good and reject the temptations of evil,
because
they are naturally attracted to spiritual ideas. God works with
us;
we just have to be willing to put in the effort and expect successful
results!
To any earnest heart, young or old, the message is clear:
“Beloved children, the world has need of you, — and more as children
than as men and women: it needs your innocence, unselfishness,
faithful
affection, uncontaminated lives. You need also to watch, and
pray
that you preserve these virtues unstained, and lose them not
through
contact with the world. What grander ambition is there than
to maintain
in yourselves what Jesus loved, and to know that your
example, more
than words, makes morals for mankind!”
by Vicki Jones Cole
