In the spirit of this web site, which is to help parents teach their
children the
First Lessons of Christian Science, I offer here
my experience in dealing with
the "Santa Claus" issue. In
other words, should we teach our young children that
Santa Claus
is not real? Here is what happened with my family:
My
mother did not find Christian Science until I was about eight years
old, so my
education in the traditions of Christmas was pretty much
like every other Christian in
America. I knew Christmas was to celebrate
the birth of Jesus, but I also knew that a
man named Santa Claus brought
toys to every kid in the world on Christmas eve.
The evidence for
Santa Claus was everywhere: we discussed him in public school
and at church. We sang Christmas carols about the baby Jesus, but
we also sang
songs about Santa, so he was obviously just as important
as Jesus, my thinking went.
Everyone asked me what I wanted Santa to
bring me, and I always had my list ready.
He even appeared in ads
for Coca-Cola.
The real proof of his existence, is that I visited
him every year at the toy department
of Rich's Department Store in
downtown Atlanta. What a site! He was perched up
high, and there was
even a monorail train ride to take us kids all about the toy area.
I had my picture taken with him. He was real.
One Christmas eve I
actually heard Santa on my roof, and saw him leave my house
in his
sleigh. I was in the living room with my mother and brother, when
suddenly there
was a loud thumping noise on our roof. The room shook
with the vibration. Suddenly,
a voice was heard shouting "Ho, ho, ho!"
I froze in terror and excitement. Convinced
by the others that it must
be Santa, I was urged to go to my room, so Santa could
deliver my
toys. I ran to my room and sat down at my window. To this day, it
is still
hard to believe that I did not see Santa ride away with his
reindeer in the sky. I am
convinced he was there.
Now, to the day of
reckoning. I do not remember a lot of details about my childhood,
but I remember this moment vividly. My anger was palpable for many
years. I realize
that most children have not had such harsh reactions
to this moment-of-truth
experience, but there are some that have.
I mainly recall the smirks on everyone's
faces as my parents and my
brother stood over me to tell me that Santa Claus was not
real. I put
up an argument, and reminded them of the night I saw him fly away
from
our house. My Dad, they informed me, was the one on the roof.
My active imagination
responsible for anything else!
Oddly, it was
not the fact that Santa was not real that angered me, but the fact
that I
had been left out of the loop. My family had been lying to
me, and now it appeared
they thought it was very funny that I had
been so naive to believe that Santa was
real (yes, I know, this was
not really their thinking -- they thought it was all very
cute). But,
how could I trust them again? It was not a happy day. And, now
I know
that these scenes do not have to occur. Here is what I
found later in the teachings
of Christian Science:
For those of
you who have read the "Other Writings" of Mary Baker Eddy in
addition
to our Christian Science textbook, Science and Health with Key to
the
Scriptures, you may have come across the following in the book First Church
of Christ, Scientist and Miscellany, page 261, in an
article titled "Christmas for
the Children," written by Mrs. Eddy in
1905; the prose is a bit old-fashioned now,
but her point still comes
across:
"Methinks the loving parents and guardians of youth ofttimes
query: How shall we
cheer the children's Christmas and profit them
withal? The wisdom of their elders,
who seek wisdom of God, seems
to have amply provided for this, according to the
custom of the age
and to the full supply of juvenile joy. Let it continue thus with
one
exception: the children should not be taught to believe that Santa
Claus has aught
to do with this pastime. A deceit or falsehood is
never wise. Too much cannot be
done towards guarding and guiding well
the germinating and inclining thought of
childhood. To mould aright
the first impressions of innocence, aids in perpetuating
purity and
in unfolding the immortal model, man in His image and likeness. St.
Paul
wrote, 'When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood
as a child, . . . but when
I became a man, I put away childish things.'"
That article is included in a little book published by The Christian
Science Publishing
Society, called What Christmas Means to Me, and
is a compilation of statements
written by Mary Baker Eddy regarding
Christmas. I was given a copy of this book by
my very first Christian
Science Sunday School teacher (Mrs. Terry at First Church
of Christ,
Scientist in Decatur, Georgia). At the time, I was about nine years
old, and
had already been told the truth about Santa Claus. But, I
am sure I must have had a
strong reaction to the above article when
I read it. I had been absolutely livid the day
I was told the truth
about Santa.
I like to think that I would have told my kids the truth
about Santa Claus on my own,
but it was due to Mrs. Eddy's request,
made in the article quoted above, that gave
me the courage to go against
the tide of humanity, and figure up some way to tell my
twin girls
the truth about Santa, without taking away from them the joy and magic
of
Christmas time that other children would be experiencing.
Here is what I did -- and now that my girls are in their teens, I
like to think that my
effort was successful. No one had to lose his
or her integrity or trust, and everyone
got to enjoy the holidays. I
think my plan could be dubbed "The Santa Game,"
although
this phrase is certainly used by others in a variety of ways.
Starting
with the first Christmas that my girls were able to understand what
I was
saying, I gave a little speech on the weekend after Thanksgiving.
I gave the same
speech, only adjusted to their age or what they already
knew, over the next few years,
until it was no longer necessary. This
is the essence of it:
"The month of December is about to start. Every
year at this time, people who love
Jesus, like to celebrate the day
he was born. It is called Christmas. You will see
special decorations
and lights and Christmas trees everywhere. But what I want to
talk
to you about is a man that is called "Santa Claus." First off, Santa
Claus is not
real. He does not really exist. He is part of a game
that every one plays at Christmas.
We all pretend that Santa
is real, just for fun. We believe that he lives up in the
North Pole
and that he rides through the sky on Christmas eve in a special sleigh
pulled
by flying reindeer. His job is to deliver presents to all the children
of the
world. But, this does not really happen. Santa does not bring
presents. The presents
are given to the children by family, or others,
who love them. Everyone pretends
that certain gifts are brought by
Santa Claus. This is all a game.
"Now, there is one big rule to this
game," I would point out emphatically. "You must
not ever say to anyone
during this time that Santa is not real, especially little children.
Some parents like to tell their children that Santa Claus is a real
man, and we do not
want to spoil that for them. But, everyone else
knows that it is just a game we play at
Christmas. Okay? Do you understand,
so far? Just for fun, we will play the game, too,
and for the rest
of the month we will pretend that Santa is for real. Christmas is
really
about Jesus and how he brought the light of God to the world,
and you will learn more
about that as you get older."
Every year I
would deliver a variation on this speech. And then we proceeded to
enjoy our holiday. I cannot recall my daughters ever complaining
about their
Christmas being ruined because they knew the truth about
Santa. Actually, it wasn't
so clear if they actually believed
me. One year, after I delivered my annual speech
while we were riding
in our car, one of my daughters turned to the other and said
skeptically,
"I'm not really sure Mom knows what she's talking about."
The
victory for me was that I never had to lie to my children, and I never
had to
retract any statements. I did not have to build fantasy worlds
to convince them each
year that Santa was real. I merely had to let
them know it was a game, and not the
truth. For most children under
five, there is a fine line between fantasy and reality
anyway, and
so they were quite willing to join in a game of pretend. We could
all
enjoy December without worrying that the "truth about Santa" would
accidentally
slip out.
Does this completely accord with Mrs. Eddy's
request that "children should not be
taught to believe that Santa
has aught to do with this pasttime"? Maybe not, since
we still
included the "Santa game" in our Christmas celebration. But, for me
it was
a workable compromise, and a relief that I did not have to
risk losing my daughters'
trust. Or, having to put Santa above the
Christ.
I think I finally saw for sure the success of this method
for my family, when the
subject of this essay came up one day at the
dinner table. It seems that neither
of my teen daughters remembers
anything about this "game." I was momentarily
stunned, thinking,
"oh, no, they are going to make a liar out of me!" But upon
further questioning, it came out that they just do not remember being
told that
Santa Claus was either real or not real. They
don't even remember exactly
what presents they got (keep that in mind
when you're budgeting for the little ones!).
What that
says to me is that my children did not have to go through the
trauma
that I did when being told the truth about Santa. Little
children can handle the
truth, as long as they don't miss out on any
of the fun and joy of Christmas,
which is WAY more than believing in
a real Santa Claus.
Whether or not you decide to try this "Santa
Game" with your own children,
it is still the precious gift of Christ
Jesus that we must teach them about and
celebrate all through the year.
Copyright
2001 and Rev. Copyright 2005-2007 Vicki Jones Cole
To learn more
about Christian Science, or the "First Lessons" click here.
